My fellow Americans, we are staring down the barrel of a very strange and tumultuous election year. the continued galvanization and polarization of the primary political parties has people stressed, angry and confused on a level not understood by most. last night, an armed gunmen attempted to take the life of former president Donald Trump. and he fucking missed, much to my grand disdain.
you see, I was havin' a pretty bad day the other day. I'm a little bit behind on commissions, been worried about my health, dealing with a bit of a rodent infestation, what not with record heat for my region and a sudden black out, here I am thinking it can't get much worse. broke, a bad attitude, and everyone on Grindr looks like a used up racist rag. ugly balled things with no calculable future. homosexuality in the fucking boonies isn't exactly a pretty affair.
I go to sleep, and have horrible nightmares about asking rich people what they think of my comic, and the answers were terrifying, they either loved it or didn't know who I was and I couldn't handle either answer. sometimes the crushing weight of one's ego just comes down on you and you wake up with a whole lotta heartburn and sweat all over the bed and a mouth that tastes like 9 months of shit.
I said alllllll that shit just to say here that yesterday was ten hundred thousand times worse. my personal Darth Vader, my own little Ronald Reagan to blame all my issues on, my Satan, Donald, survived an assassination attempt. the bullet grazed his fucking ear. we were inches away from me having my first truly good day in fucking years.
On initial diagnoses, the situation looks just grade A fucked. a Fascist backed by old money aligned with corporate interests and perl clutching moral panicking sludge from the dreaded three gimped legs of the modern right in America, has survived an assassination attempt from (in the eyes of the most insecure, moronic pussies in America)a rabid Biden funded antifa Death Trooper. an amazing PR win for the ever lovely, ever lucky Donald. two inches off. two fucking inches. Also the amazing, lovely photo of him raising his fist, with the flag behind him, and all his guards huddling around him. truly, a Once in a lifetime historical moment.
Some of my friends see this as a deal sealer regarding Trump's reelection. I don't personally. It merely galvanized even further the ignorant swine that continue to vote against their own interests.I might be, no this is certainly too charitable of a give but I like to think swing voters are more knowledgeable than ever. this election, like the last two, have not been about who you're voting for, but who you're voting against. I certainly know who I'm voting against. maybe in 2028 we can finally get some real socialists into positions of power. right now we have to buckle down and make sure our worthless geriatric old man gets in over the auger of all that is the ill of the right wing.
God bless America.
